I thought I owed a blog to the world (in return for all those generous donations), especially after being the victim of an attempted robbery in broad day light in a busy market street!
Departure
It all started with a 40 hour shift without sleep. A long day running around buying sunglasses (which I lost a few days later) and hiking shoes (quality and cheap as chips in any SportsDirect branch), an approx. 12hr BA flight from Heathrow to Dar Es Salaam (Vicky Cristina Barcelona is not the best film), attendance to a Women's Rights event and an evening out at Rohobot (an Ehiopian where you are meant to eat the food and then the plate it was served on, with a few CMS'ites and other randoms).
Ready, set, go!
I woke up after 4 hours sleep to embark on a safari trip with a dude called Innocent (which he was, until the final day when he tried to deliberately drive over a cyclist for the cyclist's long term benefit, apparently) and Sang. Mikumi national park is amazing - I think I have now seen 4 of the big 5 - plenty of pictures on my FB. We then moved on to Uzungwa national park where we saw a lot of randomly coloured monkeys/bafoons and went on a mini hike, swam on the foot of a waterfall and then climbed to the top of the same.
My work at TAWLA (Tanzanian Women Lawyers Association) began soon after: a lot of women, few men folk, and then (including) me. The dedication of some volunteers in this world is blinding - volunteering, full time, over a number of years. TAWLA provides a much needed service, legal assistance to women and children. At the same time, I have grown a little uncomfortable with the way NGOs are often financed, partly the fault of donors and partly NGOs, I think... It goes without saying, you have to slow down, and then some, and then finish only 5/6 hours after you started. If you really want to know more about my work, then I have prepared a half-time report which I can forward to you on request.
Simba v Yanga, National Stadium
This is the equivalent of Liverpool v Man U at Wembley. The stadium was beautiful (built well and cheaply by the chinese, I am told) - why did we not get the chinese to build Wembley? They build everything in sub-saharan Africa and do it well (probably cheaper than the Poles, even). Simba, dressed in red and white, and Yanga, dressed in green and..., battled it out in a very competitive match. The fans shouted "Maximo, Kaseja" everytime Kaseja (Simba's goalkeeper) touched the ball (and to be fair, he kept a clean sheet and looked really good when he dived, especially given/(because of) how small he is) in an attempt to convince the national team coach to select Kaseja - they apparently enjoy personal differences. The trip back home involved a 1 hour walk in the midst of a tidal riot of celebrations in pitch darkness and rides on 3 daladalas (cranky mini-buses designed to be small lorries, probably in India, probably in the 70s), each one reaching its final destination earlier than I had expected, in dark alleyways I had never seen. Fortunately, a generous man directed me each time, even paying for the daladalas - nor did he ask for anything at the end of the trip, I was confused but home safely, after 3 hrs. Simba 1, Yanga 0.
Pursuit of an official Simba shirt
I went to Simba HQ (in Kariakoo) but they only had a shirt in L (I'm an M). I then went to another store (in Posta, a different part of town), but I could not find the official shirt in any sports store. Each store told me they had the official shirt - all they had to do and were ready to do was to iron on the Simba badge on a shirt of any colour - I was not convinced. On another day, I heard Kaseja (the guy I mentioned earlier, Simba's goalkeeper) had his own sports shop so I made my way there (in Nemanga, which is beside the super massive, probably nuclear powered, US Embassy in all its fortified glory). To my surprise, like every other sports shop, they had the official Liverpool, Man U, Chelsea and Arsenal Jersey, even Aston Villa's on this occasion, but no Simba shirt. On a third day, I returned to Simba HQ, they had a M, I was happy. Unfortunately, the price had gone up over the last 2 days (fluctuations in the cost of the generator used to power the iron used to iron on the Simba badge, or something) from Tsh 25,000 (£12.5) to Tsh 30,000 (£15), but I had to have it. However, this moment of happiness was short lived as the attempted robbery incident soon followed, read on...
I miss my sunglasses
My sunglasses were washed away by a waterfall about 50m high, so I decided not to try and retrieve it. That is crap because sunglasses are quite essential here.
The attempted robbery (if anyone starts to complain aggressively about you accidentally stepping on their little toe, but on the wrong foot, his friend probably has his hand on one of your arse cheeks where your wallet is probably located)
So, I was just putting my newly acquired Simba T-shirt in the centre pocket of my backpack to avoid attracting opportunistic thieves when I accidentally tripped on a man's foot (oops). In reply, the man grabbed me by my right sleeve, shaking me semi-aggresively (thereby desensitising my senses of touch in my rear), shouting in my face at the top of his voice (deafening me in an attempt to disorientate me) - it worked at the beginning - it was all very clever! Time stood still, all I did was wonder why an old man was complaining so persistently about his little toe - after 5-10sec, I was wondering whether I should just shake him off or just let him work off his steam - I opted for the latter, he looked really old. Suddenly, I sensed someone trying to pull my wallet out of my rear right pocket - he was obviously struggling to get it out - the wallet was quite bulgy which must have attracted him but at the same time was now causing particular difficulty. A sudden swing to the right dislodged the old man's hand off my sleeve and I was face to face with the man with the slow hands. There was a half-hearted attempt to swing my rucksack against him which lead to me letting go of my bag (with my brand new Simba shirt, laptop...). I quickly retrieved my bag and the two disappeared by the time I raised my head. My Tanzanian colleague, who had been walking ahead of me, appeared. She says her shouts in fact scared the two away. I was temporarily deafened so cannot attest to this but I counted myself pretty lucky. 3 credit cards, a drivers licence, $100, £200, approx Tsh 15,000 were saved by the timely use of the button on the pocket. All trousers/bottoms should provide pockets with buttons. Jean producers, take note.
I don't know about Tanzania generally, but if you are visiting the (in)famous Kariakoo, the old market in Dar Es Salaam,... actually, just don't unless you have a chaperone and you are willing to be hyper careful. Do not expect assistance from the locals who see it happen too often to intervene in this particular area.
A little swahili:
Left = ushotto. Right = Kuliya. Indiyo = yes. Apana = no.
Numbers: sufuri (0), moja, mbili, tatu, ini, tano, sita, sabah, nane, tisa, cumi, cumi na moja (11), etc.
Mambo/jambo/shikamo - hello/how are you. Powa/safi/siambo - okay.
Wapi = where?
Begani = how much? Bedogo = lowest price?
Cocaine and possibly more:
I visited Slipway (a nice resort) on a nice sunday morning with the intention of partaking in a little snorkelling - what happened kind of blew my plans. So I am sitting at this table when 2 friendly, apparently local, ladies approach my table. Their talking to me, sharing their culture, which I did not mind, and I shared with them my immediate plans. Asked what they do, they told me they flew back and forth to Colombia and therefore were in the business of always enjoying themselves and were wondering whether I would be interested in purchasing such enjoyment. We all have to put food on the table and so I was willing to look over this detail until I could set off on my little boat trip to a little pretty island where snorkelling was to be had. However, these 2 strangers intimated they would also like to come on this trip - a few more exchanges and I was now wondering whether they were supplementing their import business with the practice of the oldest profession in the world. To my detriment, I decided I had better plans - to go to the quite plush Regency Park Hotel and watch the West Ham and then the Chelsea/Man U game - enjoying football with football fans is the same accessible enterprise in every part of the world.
Beach
I've seen my fair share of beach, clear waters and still blue skies. It's too easy which seems to put you off from visiting too often.
Other
My fingers are aching but maybe I will tell you about these in person. Kigamboni, boat rides and a lot of beach. Bagamoyo, centre of the slave trade in East Africa. Dar, the commercial capital, boring german building, a lot of dust. My apartment, air conditioned, with internet, cable tv (4/100,000 channels are english ones, security, serviced, oh yes. Western branded food, 3/4 times more expensive than in the UK - sacla pesto sauces are premium products!
By way of a preliminary conclusion, Tanzania is really cool. Brilliant weather, half the country has lions and leopards roaming around, a lot of tanzanite to be found, awesome beaches and crazy driving. Oh, there is also Mt Kilimanjaro here - one of the biggest - its just a shame the likes of Cheryl Cole (well, I don't mind her) and the not so athletic Radio 1 DJ climbing up to the top with millions of pounds of public money (with i.e. air conditioned tents, doctors, and a million porters) making it appear smaller than it is. It is my last wish in Tanzania to climb up to the top - I am trying to organise it but there are a few hurdles to overcome to date.
That was a long read OR did you just skim it, tut tut. Hopefully, touch base again once I have climbed back down Mt Kilimanjaro with all bones in tact.
